Put down the nut and give him a hand, you damn squirrel!

I've been reading a book all about the most likely ways I'll die and what exactly it will do to me. The purpose of the book is to dispel the myriad myths surrounding death, to perhaps to the reader's mind at ease with the knowledge of just how some of these diseases work. It has only served to make me even more paranoid than I was before and slightly worried as well, as now I know I'll probably make a number of funny noises the moment I die. Great.